When Work And Home Collide; Locked Down With Your Business Partner
Starting a business together after 30 plus years of marriage was always going to be challenging. The dynamics of a marriage will develop over many years. We had slipped into our separate roles of caregiver and breadwinner almost imperceptibly. After seven years of equality, having twins 25 years ago certainly changed the way the family functioned.
The decision to buy into an ActionCoach franchise was the easy choice, compared with the decision to be in business together. We had always been grateful for the separation between work and home. When one of us was having a challenge at work, the other could provide support. When I decided to set up the accountancy practice, Rupert was able to carry the financial burden until the business got up and running.
Now, we were alone together after 23 years full of childcare, teen angst, university successes, our own career success and helping the children get established. If we went into business together all our financial eggs would in the one business basket, we would be together at home and at work and we would have to re-define our roles.
We were both used to being the leader, Rupert in management and I in running my own business, so we knew there would be clashes. There were also some traits we had that we knew would irritate the other – could we cope with working together and living together?
On holiday before opening the doors, we made a number of key decisions: we would have separate roles within the business; we would have an external office in a serviced office unit; and we would be as honest and forthright as possible between us.
It took a global Pandemic and being locked down 24/7 with each other to finally bed down those rules into a system and culture. There was no escape, so we had to work it out, we had too much invested not to try.
So those are the challenges. What about the rewards? We have both learnt so much about ourselves and each other in the last year. I can share my work problems with Rupert now in a way I could not do before. We carry each other through the tough times. Our team often laugh at the bickering that goes on in the office, but when the chips are down we have each other’s backs.
The first week of lockdown was a big shock to me. Rupert dropped into crisis mode and carried the business until I could pick myself up again. We can now work our business schedules around our home life, no more balancing one employer against another. Bruce, the dog, comes into the office with us and best of all, if I leave something in the office, Rupert can bring it home for me!
We have seen many business owners forced into new ways of working during lockdown and the pandemic. Some have thrived and become stronger, some have broken. I count myself lucky that Rupert and I are in the former group. Running a business together in a period of profound change could have destroyed 30 years of marriage. Instead it has made our relationship stronger and deeper.
